Tag Archives: ego

Who am I really?

Gardenia bud

We live in illusion and the appearance of things.
There is a reality, we are that reality.
When you understand this, you will see “you” are nothing.
And, being nothing, you are everything.
Kalu Ripnoche

Valentine’s Day beckons, and, like all single folk, I am meant to be either moping around because I am on my own, or celebrating the fabulousness of being a single gal by going out and treating myself to all sorts of indulgent goodies.

I am, however, not doing that. Instead I am going to my friends’ wedding, and I couldn’t be happier about it as they are a lovely couple who give me hope that true love exists because of the way they care for, and connect with, each other. It will be a delight to celebrate this day with them

Besides, it’s just another day – sunrise, sunset, stuff in-between. Like most things in our lives, the meaning it has is created in our heads – it doesn’t really exist except as concept. For example, even though it is February 14 here in New Zealand, on the other side of the dateline it is still February 13 – Black Friday. We are in the same time/space continuum but two very different meanings are given to this time and place – because – well just because somebody said so.

One of the hardest concepts I’ve found  to grasp in Buddhism is the concept of ego and self. That our ego is a construct of our mind and is an illusion. So in same way that Friday the 13th is considered unlucky, yet Saturday the 14th romantic even though it is the exact same day on earth, so is our ego or sense of self  a construct that we have build over the years from experiences, memories and predisposition.

So what if we let this all go? What if we could release the ego and embrace who we want to be without being held back by the artificial construct we have created about ourselves? It is a powerful freedom – not that easy but surely worth a try?

Perhaps one way to look at this is when, in one of my favourite episodes of Seinfeld,  George Costanza decides to do the opposite of everything he has ever done. Because, why not? Who says we have to be the way we are, who says it has to always be done that way and why can’t we be whatever we want to be?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKUvKE3bQlYGardenia bud